You will be okay again – the art of getting back up
The last couple years I have been suckered punched. I have also learned to get up after being sucker punched. In between those knock outs I have experienced a full and wonderful life.
How do you feel when someone comes to you with pain…emotional or otherwise? What happens in your body? What do you want to do? What do you want to say?
Now picture when you are in pain…emotional or otherwise, what is that you want? What is it that you most want people to say or do?
Awhile ago my husband and I went to go see the unique and iconic singer Sia. She was amazing and we thoroughly enjoyed the show.
She never took center stage, instead choosing to stand off to the side. Her face was never visible. She stayed hidden behind her iconic wig. On center stage were her amazing dancers and actors and her full, beautiful voice filled the space around us. It was a full production. Yet she never placed herself at the center of it all.
This morning when I woke up the sun hit my face in a way that made me feel happy, glad to be alive. It’s not because I slept well. I woke up halfway through the night thinking for too long before I fell back asleep. And today is full and with no breaks. But still I feel good.
My very favorite part of the growth process is when change becomes so real and so natural that it becomes like a fire in your belly that can’t be contained. Let’s call it a good fire. I felt this way after my divorce from my first husband. Leaving without knowing if I would even marry again (and not really caring either way on that one), not knowing how or if I would have children (something I still wanted) and saying to the world…whatever comes next I don’t care because anything is better than this. I felt as if I stopped caring about what others thought (as much). And started caring MORE about what was important to me. What was once a small flame of self love, respect and deep knowing grew big and bright.
While your initial instinct may be to say, “no”, take a moment to really think about it.
A really sweet male client came into my office a few months ago. For years he had been in bad relationships with women who didn’t treat him well. He was delighted to tell me that he had finally found a good match! But he had booked an appointment with me because he found he was picking fights with her. He was confused by his own behavior wondering why he was doing something that he ultimately felt was blocking his own happiness.
Lately I have been struggling with a bit of grumpiness.
It’s not out of control but it sits there under the surface, tugging at me. You know…just a low level crankiness. And with that crankiness I find that lately I am noticing everything that I DON’T LIKE.
While I find this statement really annoying, looking back I can precisely recall the times where I have
This week has been a (freaking) week of lessons.. I wish lessons were best learned through those bursts of ideas that you get while driving, looking at a sunset or after a really great glass of cabernet. But NO. Most of the time they come from silly mistakes.
Do you struggle with intimacy?
Do you wonder if someone is nuts because they seem to actually like YOU?
Do you find yourself in relationships where you feel undervalued?
What thing in your life are you NOT doing because it won’t be done perfectly?
This issue might just be one of the MOST common themes I encounter in my practice.
