Recently I had to print out and LOOK AT financials from my practice. When I saw the numbers my heart sunk. I felt that I hadn’t done well last year. I felt that I had slacked. And that made me feel guilty.
Then I stopped myself from heading down this path and began talking to myself…(not aloud. well maybe aloud). So this is how the self-analysis went down.
Me: What do you feel?
Me back: I feel like I wasn’t as successful as I could have been because I didn’t do as much as I wished I could have.
Me: Okay then, what is success to you, Nicole?
Well, success for me is (in no particular order):
- having enough (you know food, a place to live),
- being able to save some for later.. (admittedly it is less this year)
- enjoying/living/experiencing my life especially time with my kids, family and close friends.
- working hard at and enjoying my work.
Me: So, what happened last year?
Me back: I spent a lot of time with my dad who was very sick. I tried not to slack on my time with my kids, husband and friends (though I probably still did). I worked just enough that so that I could give my clients what they deserved while managing the rest.
Thinking this through helped me to make an important shift. When I considered my core values I realized that last year, was, in fact an incredibly successful year in that I had the time to do what I needed and wanted to do.
I did what mattered to me. I run my own business so I was lucky to have been able to scale back to be there for my dad. Yes, the bottom line is not what it could have been but it is exactly what it should have been. My year reflected my values and my goals.
Take a moment to think about how you define success.
What are your values? What are your goals? Are you easy on yourself when you make needed sacrifices? Are you comparing yourself too harshly against others?
Maybe, instead of beating yourself up, you should give yourself a break, pat yourself on the back for being the kind of successful that truly counts.
Nicole C Weiss LCSW
- Phone: 619-318-5012
- Email: [email protected]